I come from a culture that reveres degrees, status, and tradition. While I think those things are important, they just aren’t important to me. …
I come from a culture that reveres degrees, status, and tradition. While I think those things are important, they just aren’t important to me. When I was 10 I told my mom I wasn’t going to have an arranged marriage, her response: “We’ll see.” We are still seeing… At 18 I told my pious parents I was an atheist and they thought it was just a phase. I wasn’t a particularly troublesome teen, most people would have called me a goody goody. But my parents thought I had a lot of angst because I challenged their way of life and thinking.
While my mom has switched over to the dark side (my side), my dad still tries to fight me on things like going to business school, getting married, and following a traditional path of climbing the social and corporate ladder. However hard I try its just not in my nature to be traditional. I dislike rules and regulations, which is why I constantly cut class in high school, but no one knew because I graduated valedictorian. To me life is about mixing adventure and success. I love to get things done and plan to accomplish more in my life, but its gotta be on my own time and dime.
I meet a lot of other first generation Indian girls who are younger than me, I see the conflict in their face. They want to please but also get their way. The minute they open their mouth and say: “My parents want…” I stop and take a deep breathe, my response is: “Figure out what you want first.”
But in order to be truly free and make your own decisions you have to break a free cords. The first is the financial one. After graduating I never asked my parents for a dime, in fact I paid for almost half of my college education, and it wasn’t cheap. The second is approval. This is harder to do, because we all want validation. To me approval is important but after you’ve achieved, not while you’re making a decision. Most people have parents that support them in every endeavor. My dad was opposed to me joining Mint from the beginning. But I didn’t care, its what I wanted to do, and now he gets it.
My wish is to someday have children who will challenge me. After all don’t you want kids who are smarter and more successful than you?
