He approached her first as she was talking to Drew. “Look who decided to show up to the party,” Drew said trying to break …
He approached her first as she was talking to Drew. “Look who decided to show up to the party,” Drew said trying to break the ice between the two, “well I’m going to go now, I’ll talk to you later Jenna.” As Drew walked away Jenna looked up at him. He had the same look he had had years ago, his soft eyes, and pleasant smiled had gone unchanged.
“I didn’t know this was your rehearsal dinner, honestly. I suspected but – ”
“It’s ok. I’m glad you’re here, and safe. I’ve missed you.” He couldn’t take his eyes off of her. All the tension of the moment seemed to slip away as he looked at her.
“I know this is terrible timing on my part, but if you want me to go – ”
As she spoke those words he suddenly realized the context, and all the painful memories resurfaced. But he couldn’t bring himself to tell her to go, so instead he said, “Yes it is.”
She was getting ready to leave when suddenly a striking woman approached him from behind and grabbed him, “Gotcha, been looking for you everywhere, its time.” She didn’t even notice Jenna, but just proceeded to give him a kiss of the cheek.
“Alright.” He didn’t bother introducing the two of the them. He looked at Jenna saddened, but tried to maintain his composure for Sara.
As the pair walked away. Jenna swallowed hard, and tried to hold it all in. She walked through the room quickly, but with grace, searching for Josh. But he was no where to be found. She was torn; she desperately wanted to leave to escape, but she was stuck. An announcement was being made, and people started to take their seats. An arm grabbed her from behind.
“There you are, I’ve been looking for you everywhere.” It was Josh.
“Sorry I guess I got caught up talking to those girls.”
“Ok. Well come on – “.
“I’m not feeling very well, I just – I think I need to go home.”
“What’s the matter?”
“Not sure, something just hit me.”
“Why don’t you stay for a bit, and then I’ll take you home.”
“No its ok, I’ll just catch a cab.”
“Ok. Let me come out with you.”
“No stay. Enjoy the dinner. I’ll be fine.”
“You sure?”
“Yes,” she tried to give him a smile, but still looked uneasy.
“I’ll call you later.”
She nodded, and then walked away, trying to avoid being seen by him. She walked out side, and the tears started to roll down her cheeks. She tried with all her might to hold them back. To tell herself that this was her decision, her mistake, he wasn’t hers anymore, she gave up that right a long time ago. But why did it still hurt so much? Time hadn’t healed her, it had only made things worse. She walked and walked, trying to calm herself down. Then caught a cab and went home. Perhaps it was a mistake to return, to come back, but she knew she had to confront her fears head on, she just didn’t think that her worst fears would come true, but they had.
***
“R-rrring ring, rrring ring.” The phone wouldn’t stop. She turned to her nightstand to see who it was, but realized she didn’t recognize the number. What the hell just answer it, she told herself.
“Hey Jenna, its Drew. I got your number from Josh. Funny didn’t think he was your type, but anyways, how are you doing?”
“I’m fine. I just – I couldn’t be there last night.”
“Hey its ok. I was just calling, because I do still really want to catch up. Why don’t I come by and take you out to lunch.”
“I’m not really in the mood for it.”
“Oh come on, you’ve gotta eat. And I don’t mean to be obligatory, but I want an explanation.”
“Drew please.”
“Jenna, I haven’t seen you in five years! Don’t blow me off, its not like you. But if you really don’t want to today, then give me a call later this weekend or next week.”
She paused for a second, and sighed, “You’re right, I owe you an explanation, come by around one. I’ll email you my address.”
“Alright see you soon.”
