You’re all excited.
You’ve been waiting and preparing for that first BIG meeting.
You kick it off with a little small talk, then establish credibility.
And when you get a couple head nods you go in for the kill.
At the end of the meeting you leave feeling great.
They say they’ll be in touch.
You walk out thinking: “I nailed it!”
Or did you?
Days go by (cue Dirty Vegas)…
You don’t hear anything. You persist by following up.
Turns out you didn’t nail it…
They don’t want you.
You wonder what happened? You were on fire!
Or were you?
You replay the meeting back in your head, unsure of where you misstepped.
Is it possible that they misunderstood you?
Is it possible that you said too much?
Yes, it’s ALL within the realm of possibilities.
Let me ask you this: How often did you speak? More than 50% of the time?
Whether it’s an interview, audition, sales meeting, or even a date, we go in with the attitude that we need to sell ourselves and make a good impression.
Then we get so excited and very nervous. We want to be thought off as capable, competent, caring, and with a can-do attitude.
We get caught up in what matters to us that we forget about who else is in the room, and what matters to them.
And we end up talking about ourselves. What we did, what we have to offer, and why they’d want us.
We end up talking too much.
And that causes people to disengage because they realize you’re not listening to them, you’re just selling. Selling them something they just don’t want to buy.
I learned this hard way and learned that I was getting in my own way.
I didn’t need to try so hard to impress.
What I needed to do was literally “stick a sock in it”.
I decided to start keeping my mouth shut.
Only answering questions that were asked. Listening to exactly what they were asking for, and not volunteering any other information.
When it was my turn, I’d ask some key questions that I had prepared ahead of time, and after each one, I’d keep my mouth shut.
I wouldn’t interrupt or interject.
And that’s when things began to change.
When I closed my mouth, I opened my ears, and I heard things I had never heard before.
I heard what people didn’t want and more importantly why.
I heard what people cared about and why.
Slowly I started to understand what I needed to do.
How I could really help.
I learned by listening.
Seems simple, doesn’t it?
Try it out!
If you’ve already tried it, let me know in the comments what keeping your mouth shut has done for you.
