Uncomfortable Co-Founder Conversations
By Poornima Vijayashanker I recently met up with a friend of mine to have tea and catch up in San Francisco. I hadn’t seen …
By Poornima Vijayashanker
I recently met up with a friend of mine to have tea and catch up in San Francisco. I hadn’t seen him since he had sold his last company a year ago, and he was really eager to get to work on his next project. As he was telling me his idea I got excited, because I had heard this same concept only two weeks prior – a friend of mine in Seattle had already built the prototype for it! I decided I just had to introduce these two guys to each other because I thought they had complementary skills, but before I made the introduction I set both of their expectations. I said, “I don’t know where this will go, but I wanted to introduce you two to each other because you have very similar passions and interests. I’ll leave it up to the two of you to take it from here.”
After they chatted with each other they got back to me. They were pretty psyched, because they had both found someone to talk to about their idea and prior to their conversation they had just been thinking about it and working on the same idea alone. That said,they were both a little cautious about each other because they hadn’t yet met – and understandably so. They had each been in partnerships before that hadn’t worked out the way they had wanted them to.
We all at some point have the problem of finding a partner who initially inspires and excites us to excel, but then eventually things just don’t work out. You may have to have an uncomfortable co-founder conversation. Usually one person wants to go in a different direction. We have to be aware of this and acknowledge it early on, but also learn to appreciate what we’ve gained from the experience.
If you’re thinking about working on a project with someone new, make sure you take time to not only talk about the project but also about where you each think you can add value and what you want to achieve from this project. While it might seem a little touchy-feely to some, having these types of co-founder conversations helps you understand each other and make sure there is alignment. It doesn’t just stop there, though, you have to have check-ins periodically.
I know my co-founder Alex and I are pretty honest with each other regarding each other’s behavior, commending and criticizing each other professionally. Every time there is a decision to be made, we make sure we both want the same thing. We made sure to have those hard co-founder conversations early. This has made our dynamic cohesive, and the rest of the team feels reassured that they have good leaders in place.
So before you get into a partnership with someone, do the following:
- Ask them what bad experiences they might have had in the past that they want to avoid repeating.
- Set a clear standard for communicating both the positive and the negative.
- Make sure there is alignment when it comes to values and the direction you’re headed in.
- If you’re unsure at the beginning, take it one step at a time and express your reservations to each other.
How have you dealt with an uncomfortable co-founder conversation? Comment below.
