By Lyndi Thompson
In May of 2012, I joined an elite group of women who call themselves “mothers.” I wear this new title proudly even when I am sleep deprived. While I love being a Mom, I also love working. I even had a self intervention a few nights ago talking myself into going back to sleep instead of working on an editorial calendar for the upcoming year. Boiled down, my work revolves around supporting entrepreneurs as a Generalist, Strategist, Analyst and Marketer.
I want to work, but I need a supportive environment. I know there are other moms out there like me who are trying to figure out what makes sense for their lifestyle and career ambitions. The first step to balancing kids and a career is to know that you are in control when it comes to approaching companies and communicating your needs.
Limitations of Larger Companies
Larger companies are taking some steps which make being a working mom easier. Cisco is allowing their employees to telecommute (though under the banner of being “green”). Some big-box companies have re-purposed janitorial closets for “Mothers’ rooms.” Oh so cozy. Working Mother even labeled some business as Mom friendly. However, I just keep hearing it from my tiny-person-in-tow tribe that most big companies just don’t get us moms.
“They’re organized, can multi-task, and have zero time to screw around. In short: Moms are wired to kick ass.” – Stacey Epstein, Inc
That quote made me smile. Not a smug someone-gets-it smile, but more of a “thank you for noticing” Eeyore style.
I recently heard a Mom melt into a place of surrender; her white flag said “OK, I will postpone my career, take care of my children and do house chores until I get a supernatural sign that I can return to work.” The label of Mom sometimes feels frumpy and disappointing compared to its previous glamorous pregnant chapter. Anticipation leads up the big day then – BAM – she is transformed from woman to mom. Without skipping a beat, women feel that there is a clock tick tick ticking away in them to make some really hard decisions. Quit working full time, consider daycare, lose the baby pudge, be back-to-work or interview ready, or what? Whether a woman needs or just wants to work the pressure is on. If you are a mom reading this, remember you are not alone.
“Some 71% of women with children under age 18 either work or are looking for work, according to a U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics report in early 2011.” – Jon Swartz, USA TODAY
Flexibility and Freedom
Technology startups have a certain soft spot in my heart. Maybe it’s because they rattle the conventional thoughts of how technology can be used to improve our world and make everyday annoyances obsolete. One of the reasons I fell head over heels in love with startups is that they explore how work can be done (rather than how it should be done or is currently being done). Another is that the where, how and by whom work can be done is constantly being challenged, revisited and redefined. What startups need are clever, scrappy, and action-taking team members. If you find yourself looking at a job description, remember a universal startup attitude is that many skills can be taught, fit cannot.
Website domains are a bit like cars, simple to look at but under the hood it’s easy to get lost in obscure details, I learned about domains, hosting and a lot more at the first startup I worked at. Working for no more than 15 hours a week to start gave me a chance to see if I liked the company, and them a better sense of how I worked and where I could be of even more valuable. My first taste of startup life eventually lead to long days and bumpy times but I loved every moment of it, I was hooked and guess what – I was working for a CEO who was also a very dedicated Mom.
I have been on both sides of the startup hiring table pitching myself as a valuable asset, as well as looking at potential team members. When I hire, I ask myself two questions, “does this person have a good words to work ratio?” and “would I feel safe with them driving my car?” Action taking, trustworthy people are often tricky to find. Finding talent for a startup can often be a tedious game of panning for gold. It’s messy, time sucking and often disappointing. To avoid the resume blasting the trick is: get noticed and maintain your brand. That was cruelly simplified and I know that even without a baby on your hip creating a personal brand isn’t going to happen overnight. However, that’s why startups and Moms can mix; entrepreneurs can smell potential and are willing to place bets on people who are willing to row across the startup sea with them.
Bringing home my baby girl was surreal. I was starving for support. I found myself embracing a local Le Leche League chapter, a couple of online Moms’ groups and keeping my Mom friends on speed dial. Startups also have such groups and don’t be shocked when you go and find out many of the people there are parents. Meetup groups are a good place to look for “working mom,” “ladies in technology” and “tech startup” groups. Hand off baby for a couple hours and join an event to see if it’s a good fit.
“The average age of a first-time founder of a company is 39 — meaning that start-up life for some entrepreneurs is less about video game marathons on Saturdays and more about balancing parental responsibilities.” – Hannah Seligson, NY Times
Plan to Make it All Work
Once an a curious talent seeking entrepreneur comes knocking at your door, tweeting at you or asks for your Linkedin url be prepared: you need to be able to communicate
- How many hours you can work per day/week: Be conservative and be willing to negotiate.
- How and when you can be reached: For example, by phone from 10AM to 4PM, Skype chat when available and text messages are OK anytime.
- Your rate: If you truly don’t know, it’s okay to ask a friend, do some research or some math to figure out rates. Know what rate you can live with, what would be good and what would rock your socks.
- What you can offer in what time frame: For example, in three months I can deliver a prototype of the Flash game ready to be converted and polished for iOS devices.
Remember, opportunities are never in short supply and, like babies, with a strong support network, bloom beyond our wildest imagination.
